What is Love?
We have all asked ourselves what is love,Love should be the simplest act we can give ourselves to. Why do we question its complexity? It takes the matter of a minute to prosper, but we spend a lifetime tending and analyzing the precious minutes of our love lives. The following are suggestive paths to explore how to grow and honor the love in your life. You can modify and collaborate within the snippets that speak to you.
1). Look Inward
- Ask yourself: “What is my relationship with myself in this current moment? Am I giving myself everything I need to be able to love this other person?” Continue asking these questions your entire life.
- Make a list of all the things you want and need to be your greatest right now. See how you can implement this list in your life, making sure it is peaceful to all.
- Read my sister article to this, “The Self in Love” about ways to begin to think about the relationship you have with yourself.
2). Commit Yourself to the Present Moment
- Put down the phone, limit TV/movie intake, and stop doing separate activities in the same room. Look at each other more. Stop letting your mind wander about personal or unrelated topics when engaging in intimacy. Celebrate the power of being present.
3). Speak Many Different Languages
- Start listening to how you speak in everyday life.
- Listen to what the other person needs in order to have the greatest communication with you. Keep listening to the present and speak the language of that moment.
4). Commit to Cultivating Endurance
- Think of one thing you can do each week that will help you be more aligned with patience for the other. Take stock of this patience and assess when you need it most. Meditate, exercise, pray (if you do), breathe, write loving notes, or make lists of the things you want to always be grateful for about your partner. Stay grateful.
5). Make the Person Your Great Health, Not Your Guilty Pleasure
- Sometimes we can unknowingly set up a system of rewards in the other person that yields negative behavior patterns.
- This can be as simple as eating poorly when you are together. Remember that you both have a responsibility to promote the greatest well being in the other. That is the commitment of love.
- Communicate about the ways in which you celebrate your time together. Each partner should have the trust and respect to bring new and healthier ideas of rewards that leave you not feeling drained, but empowered.
6). Make Active Decisions With Time
- Schedule times or days just for love. Actually give yourself to the person in the times you set for them. Commit to the times.
7). Stop Enjoying Being Angry
- Start enjoying the feelings of love and stop looking for the excitement of anger. Realize you are worth more than a fight to tell your friends about. Build your self-esteem in every loving way you need.
- Every time you experience an argument or confrontation, ask yourself what your role in it was. What do you need to do to crave and cultivate peace in yourself and others?
8). Celebrate Your Sacrifices
- Let’s first change the rhetoric. Instead of “sacrifice”, try something that sounds more like what the true beauty of the sacrifice is: a celebration. When we celebrate our time with another, we give it willingly and enjoy that time in an exciting way. Choose the sacrifices you want to celebrate with the person
.9). Look to What You Already Know
- Examine why you haven’t been tending to the known needs of your lover. You have to actually explore why you have neglected them in order to live without neglect in the future.
- Expressing what has been coming in the way of the need to your partner can sometimes help to create both understanding and channels of even greater ways to love in the future
.10). Hug For Twenty Minutes
- My lover once resolved an argument by putting on a timer and hugging me for twenty minutes. It was silly at first, but it was a celebration of our time together in spite of the anger, which turned the anger into a fun form of love. You do not have to follow this prescription, but remember the importance of fun.
- Remember you are a human being. Remember your partner is a human being. Remember you both like laughing.
- Honor fun for the partnership, which requires listening and love on both ends.
- What is love?I believe love is an active giving of honor to another person. Love is not victimizing yourself or burdening the other with your sacrifices. Love is speaking a multitude of languages of patience and empathy. Let’s stop making love an algorithm. Let’s simply enjoy loving and being loved. I pray for great love to you always.