Online Dating In and outs

Posted on 13th January 2016 in Relationships

 

Online Dating is it for you!

author Celeste Mohan
In today’s day and age, technology is becoming more useful in the workplace and in our personal lives. Those of us who have struck out on finding the right person in person have turned to the internet. Whether the right person isn’t in your church group – sorry mom – or you’re just not hitting it off anyone in particular at work, there is another solution. While many will wait for the day their soul mate walks into the café and gives them “the look”, others are finding their match right at home.

3d Computer keyboard with Love button.
For those who get antsy at the idea of sharing photos and emails with someone they plan to meet in the future, there may be an advantage. Personality quizzes, personal questions, and compatibility games seem daunting and utterly pointless by the 50th question. However, when we’ve reached the end of this journey that is creating the perfect profile, we have matches to browse through or, if we don’t have any, details to adjust. If you’re leaving the fate of your love life to coders and programmers with “love logarithms”, here’s what to expect:

• Quizzes and tests
• Seemingly perfect matches
• Actual perfect matches
• Incompatible matches

It’s important to remember that the creators of Match, eHarmony, and Zoosk, don’t know you. They haven’t had the pleasure of meeting you and being a part of your life. These grueling questions and personal inquiries take place of that. Those of us who don’t have a couple relationships to compare to may think we want someone who is exactly like us. We want to see the “100%” match but in reality, no one is like us. What is the difference between a seemingly perfect match and an actual one? The actual match may have a mix of the unexpected along with qualities you treasure, but you won’t know until you connect with them.

Hand holding mobile with caution tape on heart and Danger online
Despite the laws of math and equations, technology does have its faults. It was created by humans after all. Don’t be bummed out when you see a match that is nothing like who you would normally go for! If you’re online dating, you’re already doing something out of the box. However, through trial-and-error you’ll find that not everyone is for you and that’s okay. You only need to find one person!

As online dating becomes increasingly popular, there are people who end up marrying their matches. Before you think about dating someone, consider yourself. How well do you know you? Hold off on refreshing the page and consider:

• What are your personal goals?
• What do you hope to get out of online dating?
• Are you dating or hoping to find the one?

The beauty of online dating is that you can get to know a little bit about the person before you decide to interact. You can scroll through their hobbies, interests, and passions before deciding that they’re someone to get involved with. While the initial profile may seem like a dream, interaction may be entirely different. Once you’ve steadied yourself, keep these thoughts in mind when researching:

• What kind of person am I looking for?
• Based on their profile, is this person someone I would be interested in?
• Based on initial scoring, how compatible are we?

Woman browsing an internet dating site

With online dating, people tend to get picky about who they match with. Compatibility tests and matches can cloud a person’s mind when they’re looking for someone to spend time with. Keeping an open mind is extremely important when it comes to online dating. With several profiles a click away, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and just go for the first couple matches. There are many benefits to online dating, one of them being that you can choose what to include and withhold about yourself. In that same light, so can the other person! Remembering that a person is more than their profile will keep you from ruling out half your matches.

Online dating is an experience. Getting to know someone is all the same, the only difference is how you do it. Just because you’re getting to know someone from a distance doesn’t mean there won’t be:

• Disagreements
• Inconsistencies
• Failed meetings or plans

Keep in mind that not everyone may be ready to meet up after an e-mail or two. Online dating is great for those who are looking to change the pace of meeting someone. Whoever you choose, you’re saying that you’d like to get to know them and eventually spend time with them. Even if the computer says otherwise, the person behind it is the one you’re getting to know, not their test answers……are you looking for more dating advice….click here

Online Dating written in search bar on virtual screen
The mechanics may be different, but the key to online dating is to treat it like any other form of meeting someone. Just because it’s on the computer, it doesn’t make getting to know someone any easier or any faster. Putting in the work to know someone, keeping an open mind, and preparing for the unexpected will make online dating a positive experience.